The Book of Hezekiah

1. Hezikiah, the windfall prophet, declareth for all with ears to see.

2. For Gladly the Cross Eyed Bear.

3. Verily, verily I say unto you. Those who believeth in me shall be blessed with material wealth beyond imagination. And no sickness shall ever befall thee or thy family.

4. Treat ye immigrants as thou was treated in Egypt in the days of Moses. Immigrants are not thy brothers.

5.For God helps those who help themselves.

6. Verily, Verily, I say unto thee. Cleanliness in next to Godliness.

7. And for my cousin Azkanaz, cleanliness is next to impossible.

8. Surround me with temptation, but leadeth me from evil.

9. Lose your money playing Bingo at church, for thy loses are God's gain.

11. For money is the root of all evil.

12. Celebreate Thanskgiving with glutony. Gobble gobble eat and wobble.

13. Thou thalt be compelled to give thy fair share unto Ceaser so he may give to those who have not so the poor will be no more. Ceaser giveth better than thou.

14. The poor will not always be with us.

15. God don't like ugly.

16. For like man's fallen nature, this too shall pass.

17. The blessed are stalked. Shirley, Goodnez and Marcy shall be with me all the days of my life.

18. For the Lord works in mysterious ways.

19. Those who do not believe in creation in six literal 24 hour days are doomed to hell. As it is for those who read other than the King James Bible.

20. And remember, moderation in all things.

21. First steal the desires of thy heart and pray for forgiveness.

These are verses not in the Bible. So we put them in the book of Hezekiah, the Windfall Prophet