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Things my Dad Used to Say

(I don't understand them all)

I cut it twice and it's still too short!

"It won't be long now: That's what the little dog said when the train ran over its tail."

"Slicker than snot on a doorknob."

"Without a shirt on. Behind the billboard, It pays to advertise."

"Mom back." Translation: "Come on back"

"I was going down the road making 90 miles per hour when the chain on the bicycle broke."

"Who dat down dey saying who dat up dey when I say who dat down dey." (Making fun of the downstairs neighbors, the Houdaks (who dat's) when we lived in Cleveland.)

"He' a good kid. But who likes kids?"

Q: "Think the rain will hurt the rhubarb?" Proper response: "Not if it's in cans."

"Don't sit there with your bare face hanging out."

"Dat must be jam caue jelly don't shake like that!"

"See that!" Pats his large belly. "It's FULL!"

"I like to make hamburgers. It gets my fingernails clean."

Things my Mom Used to Say

(I don't understand them all either)

"Let's go. Let's fight. Let's win!."

"Home again, home again, jiggedy jig."